Can't Be Unseen | Crocheted Shorts For Men

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Via The Middle Eastern Feminist and One Million Vaginas

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Pay Inequity By State

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The states with the largest pay gaps between men and women.

Via Think Progress

Tatyana Fazlalizadeh | Stop Telling Women To Smile

For many women, just walking down the street can mean being subject to harassment by men—from subtle comments to overtly hostile remarks. Back in 2012, fed up with such treatment, Tatyana Fazlalizadeh, an oil painter by trade, decided to speak out: She produced an illustrated self-portrait with a caption—"Stop Telling Women To Smile"—and plastered copies all around her Brooklyn neighborhood. Since then, Fazlalizadeh has created countless posters, literally taking to the street to combat sexist harassment. Each piece features a different woman, with a caption that reflects her own experiences with public harassment. With $35,000 raised on Kickstarter, Fazlalizadeh has now taken her project, named after that first caption, on the road. In January, after traveling to Chicago and Boston to interview women there about how they experience public space, she'll be heading to the West Coast.

Read more at Mother Jones

Thanks, Ellen

How To Prevent Rape

1. If a woman is drunk, don’t rape her.
2. If a woman is walking alone at night, don’t rape her.
3. If a women is drugged and unconscious, don’t rape her.
4. If a woman is wearing a short skirt, don’t rape her. If a woman is jogging in a park at 5 am, don’t rape her.
5. If a woman looks like your ex-girlfriend you’re still hung up on, don’t rape her.
6. If a woman is asleep in her bed, don’t rape her.
7. If a woman is asleep in your bed, don’t rape her.
8. If a woman is doing her laundry, don’t rape her. If a woman is in a coma, don’t rape her.
9. If a woman changes her mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don’t rape her.
10. If a woman has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don’t rape her.
11. If a woman is not yet a woman, but a child, don’t rape her.
12. If your girlfriend or wife is not in the mood, don’t rape her.
13. If your step-daughter is watching TV, don’t rape her.
14. If you break into a house and find a woman there, don’t rape her.
15. If your friend thinks it’s okay to rape someone, tell him it’s not, and that he’s not your friend.
16. If your “friend” tells you he raped someone, report him to the police.
17. If your frat-brother or another guy at the party tells you there’s an unconscious woman upstairs and it’s your turn, don’t rape her, call the police and tell the guy he’s a rapist.
18. Tell your sons, god-sons, nephews, grandsons, sons of friends it’s not okay to rape someone.
19. Don’t tell your women friends how to be safe and avoid rape.
20. Don’t imply that she could have avoided it if she’d only done/not done X.
21. Don’t imply that it’s in any way her fault.
22. Don’t let silence imply agreement when someone tells you he “got some” with the drunk girl. 

SlutWalk Phoenix/Tempe 2012

Digitized By Google | The School Of Venus

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The School of Venus, or the Ladies Delight Reduced into Rules of Practice, a surprisingly modern exploration of sexuality written in the form of a dialogue between a teenage girl and her more experienced cousin, was originally written in French and published in English in 1680.

The 166-page text, which has been digitized by Google Books, opens with a pseudo-dedication to one “Madam S—- W—-,” which lauds “with what eagerness you perform your Fucking excercises” and imagines “a Pyramide of those standing Tarses [penises]" to rival "that Monument of Sculls erected, by the Persian Sophy in Spahaune” ...

The main narrative then begins, introducing its two principle characters: Katherine, “a Virgin of admirable beauty” and “a Kins-Woman of hers named Frances.” Frances “come[s] to chat” with Katherine one morning, finding her alone and working “as if it were a Nunnery.” Frances reproaches her cousin for being “such a Fool [as] to believe you can't enjoy a mans company without being Married.” Katherine naively explains that she enjoys the companionship of many men (“my two Unkles, my Cousins, Mr. Richards and many others”) but Frances explains that she means something altogether different (note that the early modern 's' can sometimes look like an 'f')

Frank, explicit language and illustrations, just a click away on Google Books.

Via Jezebel

How To Get A Date For Your Cousin's Wedding

My brother and I are looking for wedding dates for our cousin's wedding in majestic Saratoga, New York on March 23rd, 2013.

We've been told by the bride that bringing dates is "mandatory" so we "won't harass all of my friends all night" and "stay under control." Rather than ask some fringe women in our lives to go and face the inevitable 'does this mean he wants to take it to the next level!?' questions, we'd rather bring complete strangers and just figure it out. Still reading? In anticipation of your questions we've developed an FAQ section below.

Dave, Mike ... What's in it for me?

• An excuse to get dressed up 
• Open bar & food all night Eccentric/downright dangerous bro-2-bro dance moves (may need to sign a waiver)
• Adventure 
• Mystery 
• Suspense 
• True Love 
• Royalties once our night's story is developed into a romantic comedy. If this happens (we estimate the chances at 85%) we refuse the right to let Ashton Kutcher play either of our characters, however, we will consider him for a supporting role.

SO - What are you fellas like, anyway?

Oh us? We're both in our 20s, single, dashingly tall, Anglo-Saxon, respectfully athletic, love to party, completely house trained, relaxed, passionate, smell great, have cool hair, clean up nice, boast great tie collections, will promise to shave, love our mother, have seen Love Actually several times, controversial, provocative, short-sighted (with a big picture mentality), raw, emotional, sensitive but still bad boys.

What should us ladies be like?

You should respond in pairs as you'll want to know at least 1 person at this wedding. Sisters (twins?!) are preferable, but we'll take friends, or even enemies. You should be attractive or our aunts will judge you, but not TOO attractive or one of our uncles might grope you. You should be relaxed and easy going as we'll probably make up flattering lies about you on the spot. You should own a dress, or be able to acquire one because we don't have any. If (when) you respond you should send some pictures of yourself so we know you've met the above requirements. Feel free to include a resume; this is a classy wedding and we're looking for well-rounded women. Interesting/unique pairings are encouraged; don't be afraid to make yourself stand out!

This feels kinda creepy, are you guys Craigslist killers?

No. Well, if you want to be techni... nevermind. No, we aren't. We just genuinely want to do something different and we don't see any other way to approach it. What would verify our normalness? Facebook? Instagram? We can have a pre-date screening (interview) prior to the wedding and play 20 questions over a coupla cocktails if you'd like?

We're IN! What now?

First off -- smart thinking. Email us, send along some pictures, information, high school athletic stats, questions, etc. We'll take it from there.

Location: Saratoga, NY

craigslist via Gawker

Jessica Valenti | A Letter To Her Male Relatives

Dear cousin/nephew/second-cousin,

It’s generally a real pleasure to have you as a friend on Facebook. I appreciate that I can keep up on what the kids are listening to these days on Spotify and I thoroughly enjoy eyeing pictures of high school ragers. But I’ve noticed that lately your taste in “likes” has changed. It’s out with Bieber, in with Tosh.0. 

You’ve indicated that you will be attending “Booty Slap Day” and have started to share videos of young men running up to women they don’t know in order to grope their behinds, run away and laugh -- videotaping it all for hilarious posterity.

Now, I hate to get all Aunt Feminist Killjoy on you -- but I love you and it’s my job. And I imagine you care about me too, at least enough to read on.

Here’s the thing: those guys running up to women just to grab their ass? Stuff like that happens to women all the time. It’s happened to me. When I was your age, guys -- from boys in school to men on the subway -- used to grope and touch me against my will too. I don’t know if any of them videotaped it or if they did it as a “joke” -- all I know was that it was really scary.

Once it happened on my way to school on the train. I was wearing a dress because it was my seventeenth birthday. The subway was crowded and a man -- I never saw his face -- put his hand up my skirt and grabbed my ass right over my underwear. The memory of it still makes me feel like vomiting. This was just one incident -- it’s happened to me at least a dozen times. The girls you know at school -- girls you’re friends with? -- I’m betting it’s happened to them, too.

Being touched against your will has become a twisted rite of passage for American females. It’s a reminder that you’re never safe anywhere. That your body is not really yours -- but instead public property, there to be rubbed against by an old man or pinched and videotaped by a young one.

I know that a quick click on the “like” button may not seem like a big deal to you -- but it scares me to think about the larger implications. I think about the high school kid in Steubenville, Ohio, joking and laughing about the unconscious teen girl in the next room who had just been raped by two of his classmates. That may seem a million miles away from “liking” a video -- but it’s all part of the same world, the same culture that devalues women. Even laughing at a joke about rape supports the idea that women are less than and makes rapists think that you are like them. And the more you laugh at this stuff, the easier it becomes to take the ideas you’re laughing at more and more seriously.

Listen, I don’t think you’re an asshole who thinks it’s funny to do something that women find scary. You’ve been raised to think that this sort of stuff is all in good fun. Not by your parents necessarily, but by culture. You’ve grown up in a country where a Super Bowl commercial for Audi suggests that girls your age actually like it when a guy they don’t really know grabs and forces a kiss on them. (Seriously -- they won’t like this.) You’ve been raised in a culture that positions women as existing just for sex, for humiliation, for objectification.

So please understand that I don’t blame you for partaking in the only kind of culture you’ve ever known. At least, I don’t blame you yet. Because here’s the thing -- if you didn’t realize before that this kind of stuff is harmful and hurtful to women, now you do. So think of this as a chance to make a decision about what kind of man you’re going to be.

As you continue to grow up, you’re going to have plenty of opportunities (too many) to laugh at women’s pain, embarrassment or the sexual harassment and assault we face. These moments will define you. Will you laugh along? Share a video, like a status, laugh at a joke? Or will you say “no,” tell a friend that’s a fucked-up thing to say, and walk away?

Yes, if you choose the latter -- the undoubtedly more difficult path -- your friends may give you a hard time. They could laugh, call you a “pussy” or accuse you of not being able to take a joke. I’m sure that will be a pain. But it’s still the right thing to do. And you can be secure in your decision to stand with women -- to stand with me -- because you’ll know that you’re better than all that. Media, sexism, misogyny -- all of these structures are depending on the idea that you won’t think deeply about the messages that are sent to you, that you’ll just accept them without consideration or critical thinking. But you’re better than the culture says you are. You’re smarter than that and you’re kinder than that. I know you are.

So please, the next time you’re considering sharing a video or laughing at a joke or saying something unsavory about a female peer -- take the action seriously, think about what it really means. And consider your Auntie Feminist who loves you very much.

The Nation

Rape Culture | The Enliven Project

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The fear of getting falsely accused of rape just doesn’t compare to the fear of an actual rapist getting away with his or her crime. Statistics from Justice Department, National Crime Victimization Survey: 2006-2010 and FBI reports.

Link via The Nation

Women In Media | Miss Representation

YouTube

Directed by Jennifer Siebel Newsom, Miss Representation explores how mainstream media contribute to the under-representation of women in influential positions in America and challenges the media's limiting and often disparaging portrayals of women, [making it] difficult for the average girl to see herself as powerful. In a society where media is the most persuasive force shaping cultural norms. The collective message that our young women and men overwhelmingly receive is that a woman's value and power lie in her youth, beauty, and sexuality -- and not in her capacity as a leader. While women have made strides in leadership over the past few decades, the United States still ranks 90th in the world for women in national legislatures, depression rates have doubled among teenage girls, and cosmetic surgery on minors has more than tripled in the last ten years.

Stories from teenage girls and provocative interviews with politicians, journalists, academics and activists like Condoleeza Rice, Nancy Pelosi, Katie Couric, Rachel Maddow, Margaret Cho, Rosario Dawson and Gloria Steinem build momentum as Miss Representation accumulates startling facts and statistics that will leave the audience shaken and armed with a new perspective.

Take the pledge [I pledge to use my voice to spread the message of Miss Representation and challenge the media’s limiting portrayal of women and girls.] and show your support at the Miss Representation website. The DVD is available at Amazon for about $15.

Thanks, Linda

Mansome | Exploring The World Of Male Grooming

YouTube

From IMdB:

In the age of manscaping, metrosexuals, and grooming products galore - what does it mean to be a man? Oscar nominee Morgan Spurlock and executive producers Ben Silverman, Will Arnett, and Jason Bateman present a ... documentary featuring candid interviews from Arnett, Bateman, Paul Rudd, Zach Galifianakis, and everyday people weighing in on everything from the obsession with facial hair to body dysmorphic disorder.

Forbes

Amusingly Horrible | Significant Others

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Readers of The Hairpin submitted the worst things a significant other ever said to them. The winner:

There's a show pony, with a trimmed mane and braided tail, and then there's a wild horse running though a prairie. You're like that horse. I mean, there's supermodels, and then there's dirt. [And I am like dirt?] Yeah. [We are no longer together.]

Read the remaining 31 entries here, and check out the Amusingly Horrible Things Moms Have Said here.

Via Brooklyn Mutt

Harvard Magazine | Women And Alcohol

When Shelly F. Greenfield joined the Harvard Medical School faculty in 1992, scientists were just beginning to document the fact that men and women become addicted to alcohol, and recover from that illness, differently—to recognize that “there may be gender-specific variables that affect health,” says the professor of psychiatry at McLean Hospital.

During the last 15 years, scientists have documented notable gender differences in the physiological effects of alcohol—differences summed up in Women & Addiction, a 2009 volume co-edited by Greenfield, who has pioneered more effective treatment programs for women struggling with addiction to alcohol and other substances. Women initially metabolize only about a quarter as much alcohol in the stomach and intestines as men do (a fact not documented until 1990); consequently, more alcohol enters the bloodstream as ethanol. Women’s generally lower body mass, and lower body water content, also act to intensify alcohol’s effects.

Due at least partly to these physiological differences, the disease of alcohol dependence proceeds on a faster course in women, requiring medical treatment four years sooner, on average, than for male problem drinkers. Alcohol-addicted women are also quicker to develop cirrhosis, fatty liver, and cognitive impairment, and have a greater risk of dying in alcohol-related accidents than men do.

Read more at Harvard Magazine

Via 3 Quarks Daily

Monkey Monday | The Monkeytail

Let's face it guys, we're all idiots. It's our sophomoric ways and our ability to grow hair on our face that makes us men. Sure, not every man can grow facial hair, but to go even days, weeks, or years without shaving allows us the opportunity to reshape our character to the sameness of great men like, Chuck Norris, Wyatt Earp and Kenny Rogers. However in all of these cases, we're emulating a style that has already made its mark in the history books. Enter: The Monkeytail. A style so obvious to our evolutionary descent that it's remained all but unheard of until now. We'd like to invite everyone- man, woman, child and beast, to submit your Monkeytail and be a part of history in the making. Get creative, tell your friends and thank you for visiting TheMonkeytail.com.

Geekologie

Today Is ... Equal Pay Day 2011

Source

Equal Pay Day was originated by the National Committee on Pay Equity (NCPE) in 1996 as a public awareness event to illustrate the gap between men's and women's wages.

Since Census statistics showing the latest wage figures will not be available until late August or September, NCPE leadership decided years ago to select a Tuesday in April as Equal Pay Day. (Tuesday was selected to represent how far into the work week women must work to earn what men earned the previous week.) The date also is selected to avoid avoid religious holidays and other significant events.

Because women earn less, on average, than men, they must work longer for the same amount of pay. The wage gap is even greater for most women of color.

Link

American Association of University Women | The Simple Truth About the Pay Gap

Institute for Women's Policy Research | Pay Equity and Discrimination

Hollaback | Ending Street Harrassment Globally

Hollaback, the "movement dedicated to ending street harassment using mobile technology," has launched in 10 new cities today, including U.S. towns like Atlanta, Portland and Houston ... But also international locations, like Buenos Aires, London and Mumbai.

Inti Maria Tidball-Binz, the leader of Hollaback Buenos Aires, says, "For many of us in Buenos Aires 'piropos,' or 'catcalls' are aggressive and intrusive. We need a fresh approach to local issues, and knowing that the strength of the international Hollaback movement is behind us gives us the impetus to make changes."

Whether it's on the street, in the subway, or at a party, Hollaback encourages women to report comments, groping, flashing or assault; the creators state: "We believe that everyone has a right to feel safe and confident without being objectified."

Jezebel

The Art Of Manliness | Famous Man Caves

Theodore Roosevelt's Trophy Room

Henry David Thoreau's Cabin

Mark Twain's Billiards Room

In reading about the lives of history’s great men, one thing I’ve noticed is that many of them had a place they could go to be alone with their thoughts. Some of these men had a study where they would retreat to think, read, and write. Others had a garage or workshop where they would tinker and experiment. But what all these rooms had in common was their sheer manliness. They were man spaces, places a man could call his own.

[In this article] we give you a look inside the man rooms of 14 famous men from history. Within these rooms they formulated ideas that would change the world, wrote books that remain classics, and revitalized the dynamic manliness that drove their success. While we all can’t have a Carnegie-esque study, perhaps you’ll find inspiration from these manly spaces to spruce up your own room or simply the push to find a place where you can get away from it all and in tune with your manliness.

See more man caves at The Art of Manliness.

Via Neatorama

If Men Would Just Step Up, Women Wouldn't Need The Right To Vote

Said by Kansas State Republican Senator Kay O'Connor in 2005.

Tea Party Jesus

Vote For The Most Sexist Vintage Ad

Vintage Ads | Most Sexist Ad Contest via Jezebel

But Size Doesn't Matter

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